Hurt is a powerful emotion. As humans, we feel hurt, just as we feel many other emotions. Hurt, however, is an emotion that people are reluctant to acknowledge and to heal. In fact, hurt is rarely expressed in a healthy way. Most often, the hurt person will react by withdrawing from the other person, or use the silent treatment in an effort to punish the person that hurt his/her feelings. In doing so, they hold onto the hurt, rather than to heal the hurt. Hurt often arises from misunderstanding, or more accurately misperceptions. Sadly, marriages that end in divorce are the result of unhealed hurt. Hurt can carry over from previous relationships and sabotage even the healthiest of relationships. So, how do you heal hurt? It is easy. Hurt needs to be 1) acknowledged and 2) expressed. To heal hurt, you must use the word “hurt”. “I feel hurt” is both an acknowledgement and an expression of the hurt. As a parent of a toddler might say, “Use your words” instead of your behaviors. After all, no one understands your withdrawal, or your temper tantrum. Say what you feel. In doing so, you will not only express your feeling, you will also heal your hurt. Hurt is a transitory emotion that is meant to be felt and set aside. It is damaging to you and your relationships when you hold onto hurt. Acknowledge hurt and then, let it go.
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